Don’t Eat with Skinny Friends!

Ever notice that when you’’re with other people, you tend to follow their lead, especially if it’’s in a situation where you’’re not really sure what to do?  When you sit down in a fancy restaurant to eat your salad and notice that there are several different sized forks to choose from, most of us take a quick glance around to see which fork everyone else in our group is using and then we use the same one.  Now here’’s the kicker – – most of us will use the same fork that everyone else is using even if we know it’’s the wrong one! That’s how strong group dynamics are.

This is an example of a subconscious “anchor,” an action or a piece of information that gets set by others, but that significantly influences the decisions we make.

Anchors are everywhere and can take a number of forms.  The food companies are experts at making their food products look (color), sound (sizzle), smell (aroma) and feel (texture) soooo good that your mouth instantly starts watering.  An anchor gets set that makes you suddenly stop in front of that specific food the next time you’’re in the grocery store.

Now, a study to be published in an upcoming issue of the Journal of Consumer Research reveals that the eating habits of the people we eat with can have a significant influence on our own food intake.

Now, I know what you’re thinking.  You’’re thinking, “”Of course.  Eating with big people who eat massive quantities of food will make me want to eat massive quantities of food as well.””  However, it turns out that it’’s not the “big people” you need to watch out for.  It’s the skinny ones with big appetites that you need to avoid.

All of us tend to mirror the actions of those around us, especially of the people we want to be like or who exhibit some characteristic (like being thin) that we want to have as well.  If you see a thin person grab a double helping of mashed potatoes in a buffet line, you’’re subconsciously going to think, “hey, that person is thin, I want to be thin, they’’re eating mashed potatoes, so I’’ll have some too.”  It’s called the “I’’ll-have-what-she’’s-having” syndrome and it’s a perfect example of the power of anchoring.  Unfortunately, the next thing you know your jeans are fitting a little too tight.

Of course, there are plenty of positive examples of anchoring as well.  In my Cardio Class for example, there’s a 17 year old guy that’’s in fantastic shape.  Whenever, we run sprints together, I can’’t help but try to out run the guy.  In fact, according to my heart rate monitor, I frequently push my heart rate well above my theoretical maximum just trying to keep up with him.  Of course he always beats me, but considering that there’’s a 40 year difference between our ages, I don’t feel too bad about my performance!  Although I know I’’m getting sucked into a competition I can’’t win, I still get some positive benefits from it.

So how do you prevent the way your own mind works from totally destroying your diet?  Here are some tips:

1.  Be aware of the anchors that are constantly trying to influence your behavior. In everything from shoes to toothpaste, “Madison Avenue” is constantly trying to get you to associate their product or service with a “gotta-have-it-now” state of mind.  See it for the sales pitch it is and then you choose how you will respond.

2.  Keep food in its proper place. The main purpose of food is to fuel your body, period.  Food is not for pleasure, or a form of escape, or something to help you cope with an unpleasant experience.  Work on any false beliefs or misconceptions you might have about food, or that involves food, because until you do, overeating will always be a part of your life.  Yes, this will be hard, especially if you belong to a culture where food is an integral part of every social event.

3.  Don’t let the group dictate your diet. Realize that your mother was right: – be careful who you associate with because your friends will shape you, including your eating habits and portion sizes.  Decide on what a normal meal is for you and then stick to it, no matter who you’’re with or where you go.  If you don’’t normally eat dessert, don’’t order one just because everybody else is getting one.

Finally, keep a close watch on your skinny friends -– especially the ones with bad eating habits!

Certified Fitness Nutrition Coach andPersonal Fitness Trainer (NESTA)

P.S.  Be sure to get my latest Fitness Blueprint called “Little Things That Improve Your Health.”  This ebook is packed with loads of helpful information on how to build a better body and you can get it FREE – no email, no cookies, no catch.  Download and enjoy!

[tags]fitness, health, diet, eating, skinny, fat, food, anchor, behavior, overeating, weight[tags]

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